Submission: “I am the man of the house, so do follow!”

“I am the man of the house, so do follow I am in charge here you follow my rules!” Heard these words or said these words many times in your marriage?

Submission is a choice we have to make. This issue have sometimes ignites arguments on marriage. Husbands usually demands submission from their wives. They always insist that I am the man of this house so you do submit to my rules. Wives on the other hand have a hard time communicating and following the demands of their husbands. Submission in marriage demands a great deal of choices. It is something couples must decide to do. This decision evolves first in the heart. If we do not decide in our hearts that we are going to willingly submit then we are not truly submitting.

Here is an opinion of my favorite author Stormie O Martian on submission. Submit is a verb Submitting is a voluntary action. That means it is something we ourselves do. It is not something we make someone else do. Just as we cannot force another person to love us, we cannot force someone to submit to us either. Of course, we can make that person do what we want. Then that is not true submission.

My wife and I had some arguments on who should be followed around the house. We even had the point of comparing ourselves on who is better. Decisions usually had to be made on our marriage on many things and it can get so destructive when arguments arise because of the issue on submission. We were raised from our families differently where I witnessed my father being the one who usually decides on things. My wife grew on a family where many times her mother does the decision-making. We had a hard time settling this submission thing because we cannot deny the fact that the way that our parents brought us up had an affect particularly on submission. We had fights but as time go by and as years had made our marriage our strong; I guess we already survived this submission issue.

We both agreed on things when it comes to decision making. My wife submits to me because she knows he can trust me. He puts her trust to me because she knows I am more capable of doing of. I also submit to her because I know and I trust her capabilities. Things like buying a car or being the provider of the family I usually decide on money matters. When it comes to decisions on rules around the house like cooking or the mother stuff my wife decides on it. On hard decisions, we both talk and settle things together. Communication takes a great role in submission.

Both couples must agree on what things should be done and try not to involve who is better than the other . Husbands must not demand submission from his wife. If husband’s demands for submission and it become intimidating and oppressive for sure, your wife will not submit to you big time. If she submits to you on the later part, it will create resentment on her . Do not let submission be a tool for you to hurt the feelings of your loved one. Wives on the other hand should submit as an act of love and not as an obligation. Marriage is a bond of two couples and this bond includes submission from both parties. “Submission is not a test on who is better or lesser; it is a test of your commitment to agree on things to make you as a team and not an opponent!”