Housework a day-to-day struggle?

Housework, as harmless as it may seem was categorized as one of the common issues in marriage. Would it be right for men to be doing household chores? Would women be always in charge of housework? How could a simple washing of the dishes or cleaning the toilet be a day-to-day struggle?

In our early marriage, my wife and I shared all the household chores. We did everything together; we are partners in doing the laundry, cooking, washing the dishes, cleaning and ironing of clothes. However, I had taken on a lot more responsibility on office work and my wife would take care most of the housework. Since my wife is also working, she had to do household chores at night. She would work in the bank for eight hours every day and would come home to cook, clean our house and wash the dishes. I know it was very tiring for her, but I could not really help her because I was also working hard. She was doing all right but after awhile, I guess she just physically burned out.

She became easily irritated, angry and upset at times. She began to complain about feeling overloaded and began to have mood swings. My wife would complain on doing housework that was really to be a men’s work like fixing our faucet, painting or carrying heavy loads. After awhile this housework thing became one of our common disputes in our marriage. A simple thing of who will do the laundry would create arguments. It maybe inoffensive as it seems but it is starting to be the beginning of an argument.

My wife and I talked and started to sort things out. We agreed that both of us must take a more active role in home chores. I would wake up early in the morning to prepare for breakfast while my wife would wash the dishes. My wife would be in charge of cooking our dinner because I would come home late from work. When my wife would do the laundry and iron clothes especially on weekends I would do the cooking and washing of dishes. Sundays are reserved for major chores like fixing broken fixtures, painting or shopping for groceries. We make sure that this housework became not an obligation on our part but also a bonding time for both of us.

Communication and proper allocation of time is very important. The division of labor is always based on what is to be done and who is available to do it. I do not care if I do the laundry with my wife or cook sometimes because it is also a chance for me to appreciate what my wife has been doing for years. Doing the laundry will not in any way affect myself-worth of being a man. Handling additional housework is not as demanding on my time and effort as I thought it would be!