Expectations in Communication

 When couples marry they usually have big expectations for their marriage and what would their partners be. It is important to deal with expectations in marriage especially during its early years to avoid burning revelations in the latter parts of marriage. Topics like expectations in communication, money,time,romance,attitudes,interest,and loyalty are probably the most sought issues in an early marriage.


COMMUNICATION:

Women usually expect their husbands to be good listeners but researches show that woman is better listeners than man. For wives talking to their partner can increase their stamina and letting go of their stress after a tough day, but husbands do otherwise talking to them is a wear out after a hard day. Research have shown that man find talking as a drain because they come home from home fatigued and tired from work, man likes to hit the bottom-line and not on the details.

What to do?

•Find an activity that fits both of your interests- Every couple should find something a hobby or an activity that you could enjoy sharing. Give or set a time for you and your partner to develop communication. It could be cooking, gardening,sports,biking or walking on the park etc. It is more advisable to have no phones, no TV, no kids no distractions just the both of you. Set a time for rest and enjoyment like bowling or doing things that will refresh you both. Give it a try and see how your bonding moments increase your communication with your partner.

•Try to understand your partners situation- Avoid telling a problem when your partner just got home because he can be tired and stressed from work. Give him time to relax and unwind first before bring up the issue.

•Be a listener and don’t answer until your partner has finished talking.

•Do not respond in anger. It is possible to disagree without quarrelling, always low down your voice. Be careful not to resort to using a loud or rude voice because it can be a form of dishonor or disrespect to your partner.

•When something went wrong forgive each other and forget what has been done be careful not to brought it up again.

•Commit yourselves to grow as a couple. Marriage involves time and commitment it is a commitment to invest time and effort for the success of your relationship. A successful marriage doesn’t takes overnight it is always a process, so give time for it to grow.

Communication doesn’t always mean to be verbal. Your wife will love you best if you communicate with simple gestures of caring and thoughtfulness. Spend time with her even with just a few minutes of a coffee break, sit down with her and listen to her with a smile that will surely make your wife’s day! Or saying a simple thank you when your husband drives you to the grocery or a hug when he comes home from work rather than nagging him and telling your problems on the spot can surely give your husband a big smile at the end of the day!